I think there is something about the creative mind that opens us to the world. There is something about this life that we love, and other things that we hate, and they affect us in a big way. They inspire us to colors, shapes, or songs. They inspire stories.

Interesting how these tiny brain chemicles... lead me inevitably to Cherry Coke.

I believe that so many creative individuals suffer from inferiority complexes and depression partially for this reason. They open themselves to the world, and that can be a really risky venture. Although not always the case, most fine artists have great hopes, and fragile egos.

Since 2008 when the economy hit so many of us hard, I really hit rock bottom. I’ve always been a slight insomniac, but that’s only because my creative mind comes awake at night. Things go quiet, settle down, and my mind begins filling in the gaps with thoughts and ideas. But not then. It filled them with fears and nightmares, and the anxiety cost me my health. Without my health, I was unable to work, and this cost me my livelihood.

For months, I was stuck in a gaming addiction, because my body wouldn’t let me do anything else. Eventually, through sheer effort of will alone, I got control over my body again. I forced myself to work 10-12 hour days, although it was killing me. I exercised. I quit gaming. And I sank into a deep, deep depression.

Now I have a lot of things I can thank in my fight against depression. Authors who encouraged my writing, family and friends who stuck by me, and prayer just to name a few. But one of the best things I ever did to myself was, well, do something academic.

Studying Science - Knowledge banishes fear. (Love does too, but more on that later.) It’s really hard to be afraid that the world is ending just because of some statistics about this year’s increase in earthquakes when you study the tectonic plates. It’s really hard to be afraid of global warming bringing us a real-life “Day After Tomorrow” when you realize what a volcano can do in comparison. Seeing how small and insignificant you are in comparison to the big picture… can, strangely, really boost your mood. You’re star stuff, baby!

These are the pins we sold last spring, all proceeds sent to Japan's Red Cross.

Studying Language - One of the most difficult things I ever tried to do was learn another language. It is so hard to try and re-wire your brain to think in a whole new set of sounds and rules, especially when you are practically clueless to the culture. One thing to learn language by trial and error, trying to communicate with people… totally another to try and memorize lists and rules in a classroom. With Japanese, it’s really hard to just walk up to someone at a sushi place and try to start up a conversation when you’ve studied for two whole semesters to be able to say, “The pencil is on the table”.

But the quest for another language really tied my mind and heart to another people, people that I could learn something new about them every day and still be ignorant. I felt like my life up to that point had been in a box, and that I had never sought to look outside it.

Studying Culture - This relates strongly to the above. Studying Japanese Language led me directly to studying Japanese culture. Then the earthquake happened, and my heart broke. I devoted all the time I could squeeze out of my schedule to selling pins, trying to help organize donation drives, and staying informed so that I could inform others. Some people said, “Why would we send them money, they bombed us!!!”

The Chinese River Dolphin is now functionally extinct. Sometimes it' s not just the people that you begin to love...

My heart broke again, but not for the same reason. I felt pity for Americans who could speak in such a way. How little they know of life, of people. I do hope, for their sakes, that they come to know better.

My culture buzz drove me to study Japanese culture further, so that I could feel comfortable writing an alternative history there. Now, I get to study Chinese culture, and it’s the same rush all over again. It’s a whole new world, so different from Japan, and I can feel that seed of love already begin to grow. I still don’t know what I’m talking about, when it comes to China, but I am already beginning to love them.

Writing and Studying Literature - If you aren’t willing to branch out into the human experience and write about something other than yourself, you are naturally doomed to write only characters based on yourself. As any decent writer or reader knows, that is a fantastic recipe for bad fiction. Reading helps you get in the mind of another person, real or fake; it lets you try on some other shoes, and really see things from their viewpoint.

I mean, THIS guy sold out his family for candy...

I will try to find the article, but in some literacy reports I read at school, studies have shown that people who read are more likely to… everything. It was ridiculous how many things were on that list, from donate to charity to attend local sports events. Reading helps people see something outside of themselves, and to really empathize for a human being. It’s good practice for the real world, and great for treating feelings of loneliness, or being overwhelmed. Most main characters are excluded or face overwhelming odds, the same way; are you not the main character of your own book?

There are many things to consider when it comes to depression. I am a strong believer that it has as much to do with the neurotransmitters in our brains as our own actions. Having a core support group in your life is a wonderful thing. Learning not to be so hard on yourself is a wonderful thing. Learning to love others, and put yourself in their shoes… well, if you wouldn’t feel right being hard on them… wouldn’t it make sense not to do it to yourself, either?

What? <.< No, his name has nothing to do with it... >.>